Tag: Widow

The Memory Keeper

One of the things that makes Mike’s death hard is the lack of people sharing memories about him. The early days were full of shock and extreme grief. Because of the circumstances of his death and an encounter with a former client who made an inappropriate remark, I was cautious with what I shared. My…… Continue reading The Memory Keeper

Presence of Absence

I went to a webinar on grief and loneliness, and the speaker used the phrase “presence of absence,” part of a quote by Edna St. Vincent Millay. It was an “aha” moment of recognition of how I was feeling, especially with the fresh grief of the death of my 19-year-old cat. This was the first…… Continue reading Presence of Absence

Grief Go-To’s

What’s Your Grief  put together an outline of “My Grief Favorites.” It is an excellent exercise for looking at the different resources that I’ve found helpful. Reading about or hearing people share about grief makes me feel normal. Here is a list of the resources that have helped me since 2012. My Grief Favorites: 📚…… Continue reading Grief Go-To’s

Music Memories

Jennifer Mullins Photography “Feeding Frenzy,” Jimmy Buffett’s live album from 1990, was a favorite for years. Mike spent part of his life in Florida and was a big Buffett fan. Although I was familiar with some of his songs, I became a big fan after hearing the live album, which was pure fun to listen…… Continue reading Music Memories

Grief Dreams

In the dead of night, when I want nothing more than a peaceful sleep, my dreams become haunted by the images of those who have died. They are not scary apparitions but grief-driven dreams over which I have no control. Some are sad, while others bring comfort. They don’t happen every night but spill into…… Continue reading Grief Dreams

Love Lives On

Long before I heard the term continuing bonds, I was already practicing them with the people I loved who had died. The collage I made represents some of the ways I continue my connections. I have a porcelain doll on my shelf that belonged to my maternal grandmother. She died when I was in 7th…… Continue reading Love Lives On

Cooking For One

One of the hardest things to do after Mike died was to cook. I enjoyed cooking and baking for all our married life. Over time, I rarely used a cookbook, preferring to create my own recipes, often inspired by something I liked. After Mike died, my son and I ate out a lot, earning many…… Continue reading Cooking For One

Nature Grief Reflection

Nature was the first place I could breathe again after Mike died in 2012. Desert Botanical Garden is located in Phoenix, AZ, about 40 minutes from where I live. The desert has a unique landscape with hard, dry ground, but the plant life that thrives here has such extraordinary beauty. In many ways, it’s reflective…… Continue reading Nature Grief Reflection

Grief Whiplash

This Memorial weekend has been a whirlwind of emotions that were unexpected. I’d wake up and go to sleep sad, with moments of peace and joy in between. The whiplash between these feelings left me feeling unsettled. When I spoke to my counselor today, she said it was natural as our country remembered the men…… Continue reading Grief Whiplash

Grief Support

One of the few good things that came out of the pandemic is the availability to find grief support no matter where you live, thanks to Zoom and other technology. Though being with other people is nice, it’s not always feasible. I attended three webinars on grief this week, two related to Mother’s Day. The…… Continue reading Grief Support