Category: Grief

Dealing with grief after the death of a loved one.

Grief Dreams

In the dead of night, when I want nothing more than a peaceful sleep, my dreams become haunted by the images of those who have died. They are not scary apparitions but grief-driven dreams over which I have no control. Some are sad, while others bring comfort. They don’t happen every night but spill into…… Continue reading Grief Dreams

Love Lives On

Long before I heard the term continuing bonds, I was already practicing them with the people I loved who had died. The collage I made represents some of the ways I continue my connections. I have a porcelain doll on my shelf that belonged to my maternal grandmother. She died when I was in 7th…… Continue reading Love Lives On

Cooking For One

One of the hardest things to do after Mike died was to cook. I enjoyed cooking and baking for all our married life. Over time, I rarely used a cookbook, preferring to create my own recipes, often inspired by something I liked. After Mike died, my son and I ate out a lot, earning many…… Continue reading Cooking For One

A New Kind of Birthday

“You were the first baby I saw being born,” my mom would tell me when she would wish me a happy birthday every year. I was the second of five children. The window was at an angle that allowed her to see my entrance into the world. “You were always in a hurry, ready to…… Continue reading A New Kind of Birthday

A Love Letter to My Father

Dear Dad, On this first Father’s Day without you, the words that come to mind when I think of you are kind, compassionate, supportive, faithful, and my champion and cheerleader. I can feel you in the way I live my life, especially in your example of how you treated the least among us. How you…… Continue reading A Love Letter to My Father

Nature Grief Reflection

Nature was the first place I could breathe again after Mike died in 2012. Desert Botanical Garden is located in Phoenix, AZ, about 40 minutes from where I live. The desert has a unique landscape with hard, dry ground, but the plant life that thrives here has such extraordinary beauty. In many ways, it’s reflective…… Continue reading Nature Grief Reflection

Grief Whiplash

This Memorial weekend has been a whirlwind of emotions that were unexpected. I’d wake up and go to sleep sad, with moments of peace and joy in between. The whiplash between these feelings left me feeling unsettled. When I spoke to my counselor today, she said it was natural as our country remembered the men…… Continue reading Grief Whiplash

Grief Support

One of the few good things that came out of the pandemic is the availability to find grief support no matter where you live, thanks to Zoom and other technology. Though being with other people is nice, it’s not always feasible. I attended three webinars on grief this week, two related to Mother’s Day. The…… Continue reading Grief Support

Transitions

I’ve never liked change. But, unfortunately, life is about constant change: birth, growing up, working, relationships, health, and death. The first and last are the bookmarks of life. It’s the in-between that is messy and unpredictable. I wish I could hold onto moments of joy forever, while I’d rather forget the most painful times. All…… Continue reading Transitions

Assumptive Grief

Last week, I attended a virtual seminar by Wendy Kessler, MSW, FT, called “Relinquishing Our Assumptive Grief.” This was the first time that I had heard that term, but it is what I’ve lived through with each death that I’ve experienced, especially when my husband died. Wendy defines it as “the core beliefs that ground,…… Continue reading Assumptive Grief