Tag: coping with grief

A Love Letter to My Father

Dear Dad, On this first Father’s Day without you, the words that come to mind when I think of you are kind, compassionate, supportive, faithful, and my champion and cheerleader. I can feel you in the way I live my life, especially in your example of how you treated the least among us. How you…… Continue reading A Love Letter to My Father

Grief Whiplash

This Memorial weekend has been a whirlwind of emotions that were unexpected. I’d wake up and go to sleep sad, with moments of peace and joy in between. The whiplash between these feelings left me feeling unsettled. When I spoke to my counselor today, she said it was natural as our country remembered the men…… Continue reading Grief Whiplash

Grief Support

One of the few good things that came out of the pandemic is the availability to find grief support no matter where you live, thanks to Zoom and other technology. Though being with other people is nice, it’s not always feasible. I attended three webinars on grief this week, two related to Mother’s Day. The…… Continue reading Grief Support

Assumptive Grief

Last week, I attended a virtual seminar by Wendy Kessler, MSW, FT, called “Relinquishing Our Assumptive Grief.” This was the first time that I had heard that term, but it is what I’ve lived through with each death that I’ve experienced, especially when my husband died. Wendy defines it as “the core beliefs that ground,…… Continue reading Assumptive Grief

Unexpected Grief

I was caught off guard this week by grief as Easter is approaching. After ten days of photographing the Phoenix Film Festival with long covid, I was exhilarated and exhausted. I’ve been a volunteer at the festival for seven years, and I’ve met the nicest people. Last year, I could only photograph the first weekend…… Continue reading Unexpected Grief

Reflection: 11 Years A Widow

Our Wedding, 1984. I was going to put in the last photo I have of Mike, but it makes me too sad. This March, I have lived in the fog that comes before Mike’s deathaversary. I can’t track the day or date, as if this will keep the date and pain from coming. Living in…… Continue reading Reflection: 11 Years A Widow

Holding Space

The greatest gift you can give a grieving person is to hold space for their grief. Our first instinct is to want to fix the pain that someone is in. But, with death, you can’t fix it because you can’t bring that person back to life or the grief that comes with it. I didn’t…… Continue reading Holding Space

Overlapping Grief Years

When Mike died in 2012, I went to a support group for people who had spouses/partners that had died. A man shared that the first year is hard, but the second year is harder. It had only been six months since Mike’s death, and this was not something I wanted to hear. However, I was…… Continue reading Overlapping Grief Years

Losing A Part of Myself

I read this sentiment in a memoir and then heard it again in a free monthly webinar by Wendy Kessler, MSW, FT, on Reimagining Love. When the person we love dies, it is unlike a scar that heals. Instead, it is an amputation that we learn to adapt to. We are never the same. Instead,…… Continue reading Losing A Part of Myself

Grief Storm

The life of a griever-aloneness, triggers, tears, exhaustion, and heartbreak. A never-ending cycle, especially when the shock wears off and the reality sets in. It is more challenging that you are going along, thinking you’ve got this, only to be hit by a tsunami of grief. It’s like having a band-aid being ripped off a…… Continue reading Grief Storm