Tag: adjusting to change

Cooking For One

One of the hardest things to do after Mike died was to cook. I enjoyed cooking and baking for all our married life. Over time, I rarely used a cookbook, preferring to create my own recipes, often inspired by something I liked. After Mike died, my son and I ate out a lot, earning many…… Continue reading Cooking For One

A New Kind of Birthday

“You were the first baby I saw being born,” my mom would tell me when she would wish me a happy birthday every year. I was the second of five children. The window was at an angle that allowed her to see my entrance into the world. “You were always in a hurry, ready to…… Continue reading A New Kind of Birthday

Transitions

I’ve never liked change. But, unfortunately, life is about constant change: birth, growing up, working, relationships, health, and death. The first and last are the bookmarks of life. It’s the in-between that is messy and unpredictable. I wish I could hold onto moments of joy forever, while I’d rather forget the most painful times. All…… Continue reading Transitions

Assumptive Grief

Last week, I attended a virtual seminar by Wendy Kessler, MSW, FT, called “Relinquishing Our Assumptive Grief.” This was the first time that I had heard that term, but it is what I’ve lived through with each death that I’ve experienced, especially when my husband died. Wendy defines it as “the core beliefs that ground,…… Continue reading Assumptive Grief

Letting Go

I belong to an online grief group with a meetup to get things done. One of the hard things to do when you’re grieving is to complete tasks. On Saturday, I tried to do three things at once: empty the dishwasher, take care of the clothes in the drier, and make a salad. I had…… Continue reading Letting Go

Adjusting to the Unexpected

This year has been a reminder of how fragile life is and that you can’t take anything for granted. Having lived through the death of both my parents and then catching COVID a month after my dad died was overwhelming. Little did I know that two weeks after recovering from COVID, I would have to…… Continue reading Adjusting to the Unexpected

Adjusting to What Is

Desolation-How Grief Feels Copyright-Jennifer Mullins Photography I picked up Megan Devine’s book. It’s OK That You’re Not OK, my grief bible last night, which I read when I’m struggling with the fresh grief from my mom’s death and the pain that lives quietly for the most part from the death of my husband ten years…… Continue reading Adjusting to What Is

Unexpressed Love

Copyright Jennifer Mullins Denial is a hard habit to break. I’ve been struggling to get a good night’s sleep for the last two weeks. I wake up groggy, and my body hurts. Sometimes, naps take the edge off, while I’m tense other times. Writing this the day before Thanksgiving reminds me that my body keeps…… Continue reading Unexpressed Love

The Second Year Is Harder

Copyright Jennifer Mullins In my second session of the hospice support group, a widower shared that as hard as the first year was, the second year was more challenging. It had only been five months since Mike had died, and the pain was so fresh. How could it be worse than this? The first year…… Continue reading The Second Year Is Harder