In the past year, poetry has sought me out and inspired me to start writing poems, another creative pursuit that I had not envisioned doing with my life. I started hearing poems read by their authors in my Instagram feed. Each one touched me as the poet gave life to what they had written. Hearing the words read in the cadence as they were intended had a deeper impact. The more I listened, the more I felt seen as they often mirrored the events that I have walked through. I also began buying poetry books by the authors who spoke to me most, such as Becky Hemsley and Alicia Cook. One of the things that I love about Alicia’s work is that she pairs each poem with a song. After reading the poem, I will check out the track which often is added to my playlist.
The pivotal moment that launched me into writing my own poetry came when I heard an interview with Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer on the Grief and Light podcast. I loved hearing her read her poems and the gentleness of her voice. She has a beautiful way of expressing the loveliness in the world and the grief she has encountered in her personal experiences. The ability to live in a world of joy and grief is something that I have faced firsthand. The following two insights that Rosemerry shared influenced me to explore this path and dive deeper into the emotional landscape that I live in:
- “It doesn’t have to be good; it has to be true.” This gave me the freedom to focus on creating poems that reflect my experience and let go of perfectionism.
- “Writing is breathing in, and sharing is breathing out.” This was such a powerful statement. Writing lets me delve into my internal and external views of the world. Creating my “Beautiful Bittersweet Life Poems Blog” allows me to breathe out, releasing my words into the world.
Not only did I buy her poetry books, but I also subscribed to the Ritual app, where Rosemerry reads a daily poem, reflects on it, reads it again, and then offers a suggestion of what you can write based on the poem. I listen to this first thing when I wake up in the morning. I’ve also created a poetry inspiration note on my note app, with the date, name of the poem, and the prompt. This way I can come back to it when I have time.
How Has Writing Poetry Impacted Me
In poetry, I’m able to express my raw emotions in a way that is not possible in essay form. The idea usually comes first, but it takes time and patience before the poem is ready to be expressed. Usually, by the time that I sit down to write, the form has already taken shape, and the words flow effortlessly. There are times when this doesn’t happen. I will take a step back so that I don’t force an idea that’s not ready to be seen. Other times, I just leave the idea on the page and move on. I often find that I breathe more deeply and feel my body calm as I free the feelings that have been taking up space. There are times, for instance, when I cried through the writing of a poem.
Never Enough Time
Tonight, my heart aches for you,
as your absence stretches out like the universe.
Where memories of you are as numerous as the stars,
but your presence is forever out of reach.
You were my strength and font of wisdom
when I felt lost and scared.
No trip was too long to take to help me out,
my road warrior who loved to be behind the wheel.
You held me tight when I was young,
protective of your brood of children.
I still remember the tears on my cheeks
when you would leave us at camp
to return to work for the week.
How I wish I could sit by your side,
just one more time, and hear the love in your voice,
the joy you had recounting your many adventures.
But one more time would never be enough.
So, I trek through this world,
buoyed by the love you infused in me.
I carry you with me wherever I go,
sharing stories with people who didn’t
have the good fortune to know you.
But then there will be days like this,
when my body isn’t working right,
and I’m hollowed out, that I’ll
long to hear you say, “Hey, Jen. It’s dad.
I’ll talk to you later.”
“Never Enough Time” is about my dad, who died on July 24, 2022. My heart was aching for him, and I was missing the steadiness that he provided in my life. I had been feeling overwhelmed physically and emotionally with the chronic conditions that I live with. I longed to hear the reassurance I could always count on when he would call me. The poem and tears provided a catharsis that I needed.
The other reason that I love writing poems is that I can express myself so much in short verse. Though I have so many ideas written down to write about, I usually find myself writing about something I’m dealing with at the moment or an idea that has piqued my interest.
Being open and curious has helped me once more to find a way to be creative, which I find to be the most healing experience on my journey.
Visit Beautiful Bittersweet Life Poems Blog to read my poems exploring love, loss, and life.
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